“Christians don’t tell lies, they just go to church and sing them” A.W. Tozer
One Sunday in April I stood in church and sang ”I Exalt Thee” yet as I was singing I couldn’t stop asking myself “Do I exalt thee? Really?” How often during the course of a day do I exalt myself? Or expect others to exalt me? A.W Tozer was right, I was singing a lie. I reflected on how pride is the foundation for all sin. My needs, okay wants, come first. As I was singing I couldn’t stop asking myself “Do I exalt Thee” or do my desires supercede His?
Often times that pride is not manifested externally, but in my heart I feel it raise its head. I silently make judgments about how someone stacks up to me. Are they smarter, thinner, funnier or am I? Too often it is me who comes out ahead. And too often the inflection in my voice betrays what is hidden in my heart. My tone implies that I am too busy and too important to bother with you.
What is most grievous is that I at times have allowed myself to be so calloused to those thoughts that it isn’t until much later when I ask the Holy Spirit to shine a spotlight on my sin that those thoughts of self righteousness take center stage. Phillipians 2:3 tells me not to do anything from rivalry or conceit but how often do I need to get an unwarranted word in to a conversation to showcase my wisdom or education? How often do I cut people off in conversation because I know that what I have to say bears far more importance than anything they would have to contribute? How often do rules not apply to me? How often I need to let others know of my good deeds despite the command to do my deeds in humility?
It took my son to point out that when I am rushed I tend to ‘”prance around and shout out orders”. Ouch. Painful but true, in those moments my flesh makes sure that my son knows how inept he is and what a disappointment his performance is. My pride and self-importance overshadows my teaching of him and renders it ineffective. My pride has trumped the respect I am to show my husband when I quickly scoff at comments he makes about the children because after all, not only am I a woman and thus born with superior intuition and perception, but I am also a mother and it is I who know all when it comes to the children. Fortunately our gracious Father is quick to lay low my pride and provides opportunity throughout the day to remind me of who I am and who He is.
So what am I to do to exalt thee and not me? On a daily basis I need to asses myself in the light of God’s holiness. I need to remember that God is opposed to the proud (1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6)? I need to heed the command to consider others more significant than myself (Phil 2:3). I need to step down from my perch and ask the Holy Spirit to illuminate how I exalt me, so that “I Exalt Thee” is not just a song but a way of life.
