« No Evidence for Christ? |
Main
| God or Not: New Carnival »
Driven or Disciplined?
Today, another person complemented me. I’ve heard it before. People tell me how good I am at getting things done in my free time, how good I am at rapidly accomplishing large tasks. It makes me laugh.
You see, while I am good at getting things done, I am not good at being consistent or balanced.
For example, I got through college with a 3.98 GPA. How? I started off each semester with a bang, and feverishly got as much done as I could in the first few weeks. One time I had all my reading for the next four months finished in the first two weeks. I sat down and read a 500 page sociology textbook in one exhausting sitting—well, except the final 20 pages which I never finished.
Sounds impressive? Not so much. Maybe if I had used the remaining three and a half months wisely, it would be impressive. But I worked hard at first so that I wouldn’t have to be disciplined later on. And I didn’t retain what I learned because I didn’t want to be bothered with consistent review.
Unfortunately, there are crucial parts of life which don’t respond well to the “do it all at once and get it over with” method. Ever tried doing six months worth of exercise in one week? Or how about getting all your prayers taken care of for the next year? What about getting quality time with your husband out of the way so you can ignore him for the next three weeks?
This is the way I tend to live my life. I pour my whole self into one thing, enjoying the thrill of accomplishment. Meanwhile, I neglect the daily tasks that require methodical consistency. This is why many of my friendships have suffered. I tend to spend time with people in one “burst” and then neglect them later while absorbed in another task
A few people mistakenly believe that I am well-disciplined. Well, I’m not. I’d like to be, and I am improving. Truth is, I am driven to excess. This is not discipline. Discipline is daily. Discipline is moderate. Discipline knows how to rest.
Wow, Hannah, to be honest, that is weird. Haha. We all have our different kinds of struggles with discipline, though, and I sort of understand your drive - it took me way too long to realize that steadfastness is more of a virtue than efficiency, however much more impressive the latter may seem. I'm still learning to put that into practice, and it does look like taking things one day at a time is how to start. Good thoughts.
Eugene Peterson describes discipleship as "A long obedience in the same direction" (from the book of the same name). The ongoing methodical discipline is really tough -- look at the agricultural metaphors and images in scripture -- it takes great discipline to grow a garden well. Thanks for bringing to light a perpetual struggle in our achievement driven world.
Russell
Laura, You put it well. "Steadfastness is more of a viture than efficiency." I can be very efficient but not necessarily steadfast.
Russell. I like that quote "A long obedience in the same direction."
I'm neither efficient nor consistent, just methodical :( ...but I could relate to your frustration. I do things in bursts AFTER the fact. Housecleaning doesn't work well this way either...sigh...
Hannah,
Join the club. It's not that we don't know what to do, it's that we have this thing called the sin nature. Even though we know what we should do, sometimes we just won't do it. There is only one person that had 100% control of himself here on Earth and always did what was right. I think you know who I'm talking about, he's the one that lived 2000 years ago in Israel.
We could pick out any person that we think has it all together, but after living with them day and night for just a few weeks, (if that) we would see their flaws. (Anybody married here?) We all have flaws, but we also have strengths. I don't think God made a mistake when he made us all different. He uses our strengths and weaknesses. In our strengths we can help others and do a lot of good. In our weaknesses, we can be humbled, which keeps us from being full of pride, and pride can be deadly.
Paul had a number of weaknesses, but God did great things with him. God is doing great things with you also.
I would give just about anything to have the intelligence that you have. I'm a slow reader and often I must read things two or three times over before I understand them.
The important thing is that we all are willing to admit that we do have weaknesses and are working on improving them, just like you said you were doing.
T.E.
You have just blown the cover off the INTJ.
Hannah--are you my long, lost sister?
This is what I struggle with so much. Consistency, day in and day out. I get so much inspiration from the "Charlotte Mason Companion" about building habits--and yet have so much trouble actually building those daily habits.
Marla, I think consistency becomes even more important after having children. At least, I feel that way after getting married and having Buggy Boy.
T.E., Thanks so much for the encouragement. I'm not sure what I said to make you think I'm so intelligent, but I'm glad I don't come across as a total airhead. LOL! I always want to do far more than I have the capacity to do, and I need to seek more what God wants me to do.
Judy, I was wondering if it were a personality thing. You are also an INTJ, so you would know. We like to get big, important tasks done, not boring or daily taks.
TulipGirl, I wouldn't have know you struggle with the same thing if you hadn't just confessed. Well, you are the second person to recommend Charlotte Mason (Sparrow at Intent was the first). I"ll have to try to find her books.
Hannah.
You read a 500 page book in one sitting. If you read like I do, you would still be sitting there. You must be pretty qwick in the mind.
> I always want to do far more than I have the capacity to do , and I need to seek more what God wants me to do.
No one gets an instruction book on how to live life. God does not say, today, I want you to do this and that. You have God given desires, and no one else in the world has them. He has given you a free will, so he will not tell you what to do. We know from the Bible, what is good and what is bad, plus the Holy Spirit convicts us of sin. So, as long as you choose something that is not sinful, you will be fine.
God gives us choices in life, which makes life exciting. How boring would life be, if we only had one available option. If we went to the store to get ice cream, (Homemade Blue Bell is my favorite) and all they had was vanilla, then the choice has been made for us. I'm glad God allows us to pick out what we want, from his many options. FREE WILL, what an amazing gift. What makes life interesting, is that we are given a variety of choices. God allows us to make our own choices and won't stop us from making them and carrying them out.
We may make mistakes as we go through life, but we can learn from them. Plus, It's very important to God for us to learn forgiveness. When we make mistakes, we hope people will forgive us, and when others make mistakes, we should forgive them.
Your place in life is taken up by you, no one else can be there. God knows exactly where you are and what you are doing. He has not made a mistake by creating you. Before God created the Universe, He knew everything you would desire and do. God is no dictator, so if you have a passion to do something, then do it. God is not going to jump on you and say, "That was not my will for you".
Just keep doing the best you can do, and tell others about Christ as God gives you opportunities. God is more concerned with our motives, than in some great accomplishment that draws the attention of men. Plus, God wants us to build character, becoming more and more like Him. That's the important thing.
T.E.
You're not alone. Though at this point in my life I'd never be accused of being driven or disciplined, I share your desire for consistency. Almost anything I'd like to accomplish could be done with a little everyday.
How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
I'm so glad for His mercies.
