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Do you talk to yourself?

D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones once observed that the biggest problems in life are due to the fact that we listen to ourselves far more than we talk to ourselves. Since I heard that insight, I've practiced his suggestion with increasing conviction of its truth. Doubtless it is something that we need to advocate in place of the rubbish about "listening to your heart," which most commonly means, "Pay close attention to how x makes you feel, and from there decide what is right/what you should do." Perhaps especially for women, emotions are far more unstable and unintelligible than our thoughts are - so what gives? What is it about emotions that makes people treat them as reliable for making decisions and discerning motives?

I don't have an answer, but I've learned from the past that I'd better be quick to qualify these thoughts. I am *not* proposing that we completely ignore emotions. Even if they are unreliable for informing our decisions, emotions are an essential part of the soul, both masculine and feminine. However, it seems that especially in evangelical circles, striving to master (not suppress) one's emotions is tantamount to embracing Stoicism itself, and it is much preferred to speak vaguely about not merely giving intellectual assent to (for example) the truths of Christianity, but "really believing." The problem is, most people don't know what they mean when they say this, and so it seems that there exists this misleading dichotomy between the intellect and the heart. But what is the "heart?"

To keep this short, I'll take the definition that another has taken elsewhere and assert that in Scripture, "heart" almost always means something like "the total personality; one's deepest self." If you try to substitute "feelings" or "emotional life" for the places in Scripture where the heart is referenced, utter confusion results. For example:
"The Lord said in his heart..." (Gen. 8:21)
"...ponder in your own hearts..." (Psalm 4:4)
"But he does not so intend,
and his heart does not so think;
but it is in his heart to destroy..." (Is. 10:7)
"They know not, nor do they discern, for he has shut their eyes, so that they cannot see, and their hearts, so that they cannot understand." (Is. 44:18)

The actual dichotomy, over and against this idea that emphasis on the intellect undermines true "heart-belief," is the one between heart and lips. Jesus quotes Isaiah in Mark 7:6:
“‘This people honors me with their lips,
but their heart is far from me;
in vain do they worship me...'"

In light of the definition just offered, it isn't plausible to say that someone's faith can be certified by how much emotion they show in worship, much less by the fact that they participate in worship at all. On the contrary, the biblical use of "heart" has strong inward connotations. I wonder just how much our obsession with appearance has to do with the way our culture prioritizes emotions in discerning whether one's motives are true.

As always, I'm welcoming dialogue on this, as I know faculty psychology is a point of interest for a couple of you especially. I was tempted to go on a different tangent with experientalism, which seems closely related, but I need to do some more research first. Am I perhaps overestimating this phenomenon, or is it also your experience (in society at large and/or in the Church) that there is an overemphasis on feelings, and both subtle and overt disdain for most intellectual pursuits?

Comments

I think it works both ways--extreme emotionalism and extreme intellectualism, but I agree that in the contemporary era it has by and large been on the former (esp. where there's a pentecostal or postmodern flavor, but the reverse seems to be true in the hyperCalvinist camp--logic/law becomes legalism).

It's interesting that you're blogging about this here and on your blog, because I've been on same train of thought. In fact, I'm trying to do a study of the word "heart" in the Bible. The definition you gave seems to be the one most commonly thought of, esp. by theologians. But I wonder if "heart" means different things in different contexts. If it only means your whole self/personality, then why the command to "love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, strength and soul?" I don't think that's redundancy for the sake of emphasis. I think it means to worship God wholistically but with each separate part of ourselves.

Thanks for reminding me about the heart post I've been meaning to share...

Posted by: Marla at August 25, 2005 3:23 PM

I'd agree that there seems to be a tendancy in mainstream American Christianity to go after whatever feels good, whatever gives you a spiritual (read: emotional) "high", regardless of the truth behind it. I've had multiple experiences with talking to mainstream evangelicals, where my attempts at "what does the Bible say?" or "let's think through this" haven't been very well received! :-)

But I'm not sure if just being logical, and encouraging thinking, is a total cure. I think there's still a danger in listening to ourselves as opposed to talking to ourselves, even if you're avoiding emotionalism. I can be seemingly logical, and still end up in a mess - for example, I can convince myself that I can't know, with 100% certainty, whether or not I'm a Christian. And it's a seemingly logical argument (at least to me!). But I need to learn to talk to myself - to remind myself of the truth of Scripture, which points me to what Christ has done, and says that yes, I can know.

Posted by: JH at August 25, 2005 3:30 PM

I come from a denomination (Mennonite) that has historically downplayed major emotional expressions in worship. There is a definite benefit to that view, as there is little chance for an individual to mistake a purely emotional experience for a true and vibrant relationship with Christ. Yes, I see the benefit, but such a view can be taken to a very detrimental extreme. A happy medium is good, as always.
The ideal is for outward expressions to follow emotions that follow the reality in one's heart. If a feeling of devotion to God is only experienced because of outward expressions of praise, then a person should be seriously concerned for the state of their heart.

On a slightly different hand, I think emotions can show us the state of our hearts in a way pure intellectualism cannot. I can act in a loving way toward a person I feel hatred for. If I analyze my standing based on hard facts, I may not identify my lack of real love as I would if I regarded my feelings.

Posted by: Claire at August 25, 2005 4:55 PM

There is a great book published by Cambridge UP by James Dixon called _From Passions to Emotions_ and it deals with the relatively recent sublimation of all things relating to "feelings" under the term of "emotions" rather than the earlier understanding of the combination of feelings and intellect (a rather untrue dichotomy we've created b/t these 2 categories) under terms such as affections. A very good study.

Posted by: Ashley Hales at August 26, 2005 3:19 AM

Interesting post. I have to talk to myself just to get the laundry done. ;) Why wouldn't I need to talk to myself to redirect a wayward heart and emotions? I'm going to try it.

We did a study of the heart and conscience based in part on Beth Moore's When Godly People Do Ungodly Things. Tracing these two themes through the Bible revealed, unexpectedly, the utter unreliability of both -- unless they are trained and aligned by saturation with both 1) Bible truths AND 2) a primary devotion and submission to the Lord. This was an eye-opener for post-moderns of the heart. The hardest thing in the world, in cases of conflict, is to ignore what your heart says and give yourself totally over to trust in God's word.

Posted by: Gray at August 26, 2005 8:24 AM

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